CHRIS @ WORLD

It’s a sad moment…. 

These 2 daes, I am always facing very sad moments…..

On 29/09/05, Thursdae which is yesterdae… well, its the nitec councillors frm SC graduating… sad lor… coz had spend for almost 1/2 a yr with them… got feelings one leh….

Like aloy… my friendship with her is frm tat time like her… to now, can realli help to listen to her problems… like a god brother… and I hope tat she will be as happie and smile as usual… Then Teresa… yesterdae, she cried… she was touched by tat veri moment yesterdae… sigh… but its indeed emotional between everyone… Nikki… frm my committee, saw her there too… well, hope tat she will be singer in her future…

Guo Wei arh…. a guy whom I know quite well durin all these times… well, we hug each other after the ceremony… neverless, will our friendship progress… Ming Jie and Joshua… they are quite devoted to SC after their attachment… good for them… and now they bth left…

Den for Qian Jun and Yu Fang who are not there… hope u all do well in ur exams….

Arh, SC councillors, if there will be the chalet @ november, I realli hope to see all of u all there… dun forget me hor if u saw my blog entry…. although I nt a good exco, but I am nt tat bad…

Den todae (30/09/05), its the nitec interactors frm interact club graduatin… although there are too mani technical faults and mani mistakes… but still everithing still went well…

For Stella, Hui Hui and Li Jia… saw them 1st @ the cca recruitment fair… den slowli, they attended more and more interact activites… well, nt realli close with li jia or hui hui, but I believe they are always there for interact… thankz…

Then for stella… dun realli knw her well, but now, almost 1 to 2 days later, will be tokin to her on msn online…. its realli thru this tat I knw her more… realli great to knw u…

ha ha… we have zhen yuan, sheng yang and shu wei… this 2 guys are always bubbly and active… arh zhen yuan… still dun want me to match make him and melene… duh…. ha ha…

for elynn, melene and the rest… sorrie la… nt realli know u all well, cannot help, u all came in too late and I as the VP of interact club seldom get in touch with u all… sad…

Finalli, rachel… I dunno wat I shld sae abt her coz I do have feelings for her… whenever I saw her, I will be pai seh… dunno how she feels abt me… but if she dun choose me in the end, I believe we still can be friends… anywae… rachel, u are nt onli the angel who brighten up my life, but I believe tat the golden interactor award u get todae realli means the contribution u had done for the club… its great to see tat we had such a member…

Well, nitec interactors… we had great times together but now its time to sae goodbye… hope in the near future, if we realli meet again, u all will not see me and den walk away… cya… 

I did it wrongly…. 

Oh manz… why did I have to make tat fatal mistake??? why didn’t I have the patience to keep on waitin… now dun even know I am makin things worst or not???

Sigh…. todae I confess to rachel… startin, I thot of juz askin things related to her like whether she got bf or she has anyone in mind…. but I am indeed lucki… its no for the answer….

However, when I ask her is her standard for guys high, wat kind of guys suits her…. well, I realli dunno, coz she said dunno… no clue given and yet I realli dunno how to go ahead….

Wat’s worse is tat I confess to her after askin her whether I got a chance or not…. kaoz…. I shouldn’t had did it…. oh manz… den without waitin for her reply, I juz logout… how foolish I am….

NOW, I have to wait and see wat will happen the next time we all saw each other in school… I realli dunno…. its tough, real tough… but, if she dun accept me, I’m fine, coz we can still be friends… but I juz hope answers will be out soon ba….

WAITIN FOR MIRACLES TO HAPPEN!!!

Somethings are worth waiting for…. 

Hi there, its me again… writin a brand new entry…

Tokin abt last fridae’s musical fountain tour… kool its fun… I never realli get to see musical fountain b4 until last fridae… real nice!!!

Anywae, before we proceed to the musical fountain, we had a lot of fun @ the bukit merah home… I was there tryin to persuade the members to let me matchmake…

I started off with Andy… knwin he like Hui Ting… actualli hui ting was once on my list, since andy’s my friend, then I had to give up… ha ha… den, I gone to Zhen Yuan, Derrick and Kelvin, seein whether I can match make them with anyone of the female members….

well, one of them whom I felt tat she is close to zhen yuan is melene… actualli can try de… onli zhen yuan feels tat she got bf and nt takin action… den hor, tat elynn… she very noisy sia… I and Chi Chiang keep on disturbin her… ha ha … I also try to match make chi chiang and elynn, but no success…

ai yah… looks like the members know tat I like rachel, I dun realli know how… but they seems they juz know… Andy, Shi You has helped me analyse and givin me encouragement for this relationship, also chi chiang helped me organise so mani trips for me to get near her….

BUT, i juz keep on doin nth coz I realli dunno wat I shld do… oh god… shld I wait till the farewell party tat dae… or tell her now??? wat if rachel reject me??? wat shld I do???

anywae… one good news, aloy is fine now… yeah….

bad news…. eunice ang is givin me big trouble… (abt club fund usage)

hm…. the same situation happening again… den is serene graduatin, now is aloy and rachel graduatin… but my main focus is on rachel… wat can I do??? Sianz….

alrite… time for sleep… cya….

What The….. 

Oh manz… todae, I realli hate myself… hate everything I got, hate the things happening ard me… why????

Todae is the Blood Donation Drive… supposilin everithin is set and ready to go accordin to plan… but mani unexpected things happen….

Firstly, todae I hated myself 3 times…. 1st time, my teacher chased all the councillors out as she said this is not SC event, this is Interact… kaoz… she never sae tat I can’t use any councillors…. In the end, I have to send them back to their class as no AL is given… WTH…. 

2nd time, I thot will be better, but my teacher suddenly sae want to spilt all members into shifts… its totalli f*** up…. oh manz… how cans he do tat… and wat the hell is all the NS men doin ??? This isn’t their events… and then, I had to ask to members to slack in interact room since they cant go back to their class either…

3rd time, I am realli realli f*** up alreadi… den as 2 of the members saw nothin to do, they read newspaper, den after scolded by teacher the 2nd time, they are being chased back!!! Teacher cannt do this, if she continues, no members want to help her sia!! Its after my bro, Chi Chiang wants one helper to go back help, tat they do nt waste their time…

Its totalli not wat I wanted… who had expected all these to happen… I am too embaraseed to face them… realli felt like diggin a grave for myself…. I thot i could spend more time with aloy, or rachel but everithin seems totalli messed up….

Anywae, even if I had space to spend for rachel, I dun even dare to go near her… why???? I realli dunno.

Juz as u thot diggin grave is easy…. its not…. sigh…. after my lunch with some of the BODs, I dunno where I found the courage to donate blood… oh man, its nt painful … but I realli dunno…. dun understand wat I am doin sometimes….

@ home…. quite bored…. den surf and surf and surf the internet…. finalli saw aloy online… thot tat I could have some chat with her and ask her how the councillors are feelin… but she did nt answer me…

thot tat she is angry… BUT CANNOT BE WAT…. den saw her nick and her blog entry, onli realise sth happen to her todae… how culd tat happen??? I sincerely pray for her to pass thru this kind of unfortunate events ASAP…

may god protect and bless aloy and rachel….

Bad Luck??? or Good Luck??? 

Why Teacher always last minute cancel class one??? Always like that… damn it… Yesterdae go to school juz for interact meetin… Oh manz….

ai yah… tats yesterdae… sianz… dunno wat to do… stayed in interact room for the whole dae… kaoz… almost freeze to death…. den eat peanuts and wait for the members goin for musical fountain to take consent form …. when tat ends, had to go on with my meetin with BODs….. duh, tats still ok….

but hor… den late afternoon to evening… help out alicia and her klassmates… still ok de… den suddenly she mad @ me for nt tellin her tat she no need go musical fountain… wah…. I mean what can I do??? BODs always confirm wif me last min one… sianz….

juz admit its my fault lor… but true la… coz… its always like tat….

@ nite…. felt borin…. my stupid mouse got jam and again… Damn mouse….so sianz tat i dunno do wat… den thot of projects needed to hand in next week… KAOZ….

juz as I was lazin ard, dunno which website to go… saw aloy, den tok to her for a while… wah… watch tian guo de jie ti… nice and romantic…. But hor…. after the show ends, aloy juz left me alone… never even sae good bye…. sad leh….  no lar, juz kiddin one…. I felt grateful enugh tat aloy is still tokin to me till now..

THE NEXT DAE ( todae lor )

another borin dae… wed is always the borin coz onli one lesson…. after lesson, had to brief all the helpers abt the Blood Donation Drive tml…. juz as I was preparin to mark the attendance, saw rachel ~!!!

Its a surprise to me…. I thot she did nt want to help in the 1st place??? wat makes her change her mind??? hm….??? cannot figure it out….

wah!!! aloy inside tmr’s event, rachel also…. hm…. conincidence or ….. dun realli knoe… kaoz… maybe, its juz my own wishful thinkin… ha ha….

Peace… tata…

Time to blog again…. 

So here I am again to tell u more storie….

Sigh… too long never take care of my msn grp le… todae went back… OMG… SO mani things to update and add in… ITS TIRING !

den, at abt 3 plus pm, i receive a msg frm one of my disciple in sec sch… Da Gui… ever since I left sec sch, and went to ITE, I was busy with sch and CCA, tat I did nt have any time to meet him… ITS either he’s free or I am not… so no time to meet… but, todae was a good dae… we finalli get to see each other…

Den @ 3.50 pm, I reached Tampines… waiting and waiting, finalli saw him… WOW! He’s so tall, taller than me now… Its a surprise to me, after abt 1 yr and few mths, he’s grown tall… INCREDIBLE…

beside him is Joel, same face, same hair style as usual… also The characteristic never grown up at all !!! arh, but good to still able to see them…

We then went to KFC to eat, drink talk… talk abt mani things… life in ITE, how they have been, wat they doin nw… they are all busy with prelims and N lvl… sad that after a few mths tat we will nt be able to meet any more… sad

return home with dinner… sigh… dun realli know wat to do… well, after dinner, while watchin MIB 2, I continued updatin my msn grp… sigh… its tirin… den, Stella came in….

I felt strange when she came in, its rather a excitement than juz pure happiness… dun realli know why…. even worse, I asked her whether she got bf… oh manz… I thot I knw alreadi… DUH !?

Well, I den get back to my old topic… askin more abt rachel, sigh… but she left for dinner and our chat ends there… sigh…

after so mani hrs, dunno wat to do… sad… den, saw aloy’s blog got update, so here I am… well, cya next time den…..

Wat a dae i am havin??? 

Hi… Hi… I realli dunno why am I havin a dae todae???

Oh manz… comin to school todae is terrible… whoa, NO SCHOOL !!! why, no school, no one bother to tell me… If I had known it, den I would juz go there @ 12 noon for interact thingy…

Arh… sad, thot tat todae will go to the child care… the last 2 time I went was from tired to happie… its when u get to know the kids more and u will be close to them… todae, cant go, coz the centre got MP goin…

Sorrie, Rachel and Stella. I promise to fulfill this wish but its broken. Oh manz, i truly am sorrie for all this that happen…

the dae went back to normal after the audition… but its no audition after all… onli 2 committee turn up… although its nt wat I wanted to see, but still good response… I liked what the KE performed…. startin to notice some probable candidates for next yr’s President and Vice President…

den sianz… went to Tampines to give back the Maple CD, which I cant even install…. return to zhi liang, den bth of us loitter ard Tampines, walkin here and there… time juz flew past and den saw its nite time liao…

Not realli feelin well these few daes… havin diarrohe and nt havin appetite… probabli due to stress and tireness… oh manz… feelin sick… realli need someone to take good care of me…

den saw Stella online… tok for a while… den came to blog… oh ya, finalli able to link to Aloy’s blog… yeah… but …. I AM JUZ TIRED…. LET ME REST !!!!

Give me a break…..

Loneliness do occur…. 

Loneliness realli do occur… Tired??? Maybe… but its part of a person’s feeling… That’s wat u cannot change…

For a long time, I have not seen my god sister, Yu Fang… yesterdae nite, spoke to her on msn… she is tired and sick of her attachment.. well, its a experience for her anyway… From what I know, she do not have to take exam… so good…

Anywae… she saw my nick… ha ha… goodness gracious… I told her I am rejected by girl too mani times and tats why I dun dare to tell the girl I like that I have feelings for her… but what she said was…. U HAD BETTER TELL HER BEFORE SHE IS SNATCH BY OTHER GUYS…

Saying is easy… how should I do tat??? Sigh… u thot its easy… Its never easy anywae… sigh… especially when u meet rachel… u will not know what to do… she is simply an angel…

Well well, for my studies… too mani project… when mixing wif CCAs… well, its juz stressful… I SIMPLY FEEL LIKE DYING…. anyone got remedy for stress???

HOW I FEEL TO ESCAPE FROM THIS ZONE??? when you do not have anyone to console you, its difficult to face this alone… oh manz… shld I really get mad one dae, who will take care of me???

Oh ya, one great thing… aloy added my blog into her blog site… yeah!! promotion mah… so tat ppl can understand me and see my touchin stori mah…

ARH… I am always feeling to do something great… That’s where I promise my junior who are graduating soon that I will do something for them if they need me to… see, I am goin to be a saint… no lar… juz feelin that if there’s somethings I culd do, den I juz go ahead and fulfill for them lor…

now… its late in the nite… where is the LOVE??? the LOVE??? the LOVE??? ok… I goin to sleep soon after a tiring NBA live 2005 game… tired?? ya… goin to sleep lor… tata

Welcome a new month… 

A new month and here it is… Its September….

How I wished I could grab hold of so many chances… Never to let it go off… but I juz couldn’t, becoz… I can’t…

I knew my chances with aloy is gettin lesser and lesser… but I do not realli want to do anything… Its better to be in this wae than to let her scared of me and avoid me….

Den knowing rachel… its great… she’s an angel… but there is nothing I can do anywae… coz I am afraid… I believe to love her by fulfilling her wishes and to helped her in watever wae I can is wat I shld do now… I cannot sae wat will happen between bth of us… I am nt expectin anythin either… coz… its better to be this wae…

Never knew life can be like that… Love is also the same… for me… aloy did not gave me any hope, but she and I did have our moments together… Now, its probabli rachel… but too bad, she is graduating soon… Is this an ending or is this a beginning??? I realli dunno…

MAYBE for me… I can hardly communicate to ppl… not to sae the girls I liked… like for serene, I did tried… 2 times of more… but failed… “When u tell the other person u liked her, but u did not do anything for her…. How will u be able to touch her?”

Probably this is the best solution for me…. WAIT….

I thought life has been a easier for me… CCAs… are not that good… after the holidaes… its back to my busy schedule and more things to do… For student council… my chairman went missing… WHERE IS NELITA ??? This is a question for me to know, for she to answer…. Now the whole committee, I have to take charge… its realli not easy… especially u have attitute members like ming jie and joshua… but they are couple ar… so if u can tok thru one, than the other is not a problem….

Sometimes, communication is more important than anything in life… If the one who are following you, knows what u want and follow u… den ur problems will be all solved…

BUT… as u wonder where the problem came from, U suddenly will nt know… Like suddenly, Faisal saw the missing of Nelita, he wanted me to take over… But I sae onli for temporary… coz, its never fair for me to take over her place… and I always believe in her leadership… THATS WHY NELTA IS MY CHAIRMAN…. and she will always be….

Teacher’s dae was juz yesterdae… I went back with nash to secondary school… saw onli some of my school mates went back… others were juz missing… SAD… met Mr Halim (aka The Rock) coz… he juz looks like one… and my maths teacher, Ms. Ang… glad to still see her… hm… she has more white hair….

She seems quite happie to knw that nash and me are having a bright future and nice time in Poly and ITE… she is also proud of bth of our acheievements … I am glad that if nt for her, my maths will get F9 and not D7 in O level… tats quite a difficult time for me in sec 5, but she helped me a lot…

We interacted for quite a long time… a question keeps bothering me from Ms. Ang is….  WHY DID THE COUNCIL CHOSE ME AS AN EXCO??? …. its indeed bothering… but if nobody believed u, will u be in, I doubt it… maybe this is the reason, I am chosen into the top 15… becoz, ppl believed in me…

Project Superstar has ended… Kelvin Tan won against Kelly Poon… well, both are my fav. idol, and I support bth… I dun think there is anything wrong with who winning… Whoever wins, media will still tok abt it… there is never a happie ending in any competition, media alwayz wanted news, but never thot will tat hurt the ppl involved…

The public have to be responsible either… if their fav. superstar lost, they blame others… but have they thot if they wanted that particular person to win… Action is more important than anything, so did u vote to make it happen??? Before u blame anyone… please think….

Kelvin’s miracle win only proves to me one thing… Never give up your dreams and hopes… Why blame a person who has disabilities??? I juz dun get it… yesh, there may be some sympatize… but if u vote for other contestants… den wat will the public reply ??? wat will the media sae??? still this things keeps on happening…. why???

Finally, came to the home visit todae… nice one… interaction with the elderlys… anywae… took over chi chiang in his grps… well, givin me chance to see more of rachel… but no action taken…

Its best to be in this wae…. I suppose….

Finalli, I will pray for u all @ nite…. whether its aloy, yu fang, rachel, stella, hui ting (bth), ah li, serene … thanks for all the things we had been thru together…

cya next time…